Just A Thought

I’m not really into turning into a big Michael Jackson fan just because he died, but he made some great songs, so I figured I might share my favorite one with you and what is pretty much the best music Video ever next to Thriller

just finished going through my old emails from like three years ago…I think I messed things up with a really good girl

So when I first got to my current college, I met this girl, really pretty girl great personality with a lot of goals. we were kind of dating for a bit, but for some reason I screwed things up. I dont even remember why I ended things with her but I did.  Anyways out of boredome I’ve been going through my Myspace Message inbox, and found an old message she sent me. I think this is after we stopped dealing with each other.

To:

• The man wit the pl…

Date:

Feb 13, 2007 1:03 AM

Subject:

Hey…

I never wrote to you before so I thought I would give it a shot. Was wondering what you did today….The gurlz hung out today. We were actually comforting Dafina because her boyfrined was really doing her wrong today(basically broke up with her). Renna also had an encounter with her man, and we had to comfort her as well. The both of them were a hot mess today. I was trying to give them advice on what to do in a situation like that. They both would not listen though…wat was said was done. Made me think a bit…On how depressed everyone was today… between you, reena and dafina. Kinda strange how a whole day can bring down someones spirit to the point of no self control. Not knowing what to do or say, not knowing to be the same person or change to fit someone elses needs. I felt for all of you today. Stanley, I really did not have too much time to talk you but I think it is important that you follow your heart. Listen to your spirit and if your spirit is telling you to go right then do it. You shouldn’t feel bothered or ashamed if your heart is telling you what to do. God has a plan for all of us and whatever the case may have been, you were supposed to be in my life, the way you were, for whatever amount of time you were…for a reason. Its a lesson that will probabaly unfold later in life. I just thank you for being such a sweet person and I thank you for always being honest with me. You have such a great personality and don’t let the obsticals of life, tainted love or unwanted liers change who you are. I know you will be a great friend to me and I hope you know I will be a great friend to you.

Much luv my brotha…
Cheriece

Body:

I dont know what our relationship may have turned into. For all I know that was the end..But I get the feeling I cheated myself out of a great girl from ignorance and immaturity. I just wrote her a message and left it in her facebook inbox… hears what it say’s..

Hey whats up*****

… I know this is Extremely random, but I was going through my old Inbox messages on myspace and I still had a couple of our Convo’s saved. It brought me back to the time when you and I were in the same building and hung out a bit.. I thought about our falling out and three years removed from it, I see that I was a real jerk to you. You were always a good friend, and for whatever reason I couldn’t handle that, I was to busy waiting for someone to do something bad to me I didn’t realize I had a good friend right in front of me. I know at this point your probably re reading this email trying to figure out what would posses me to send this message, but I really feel in my heart that I owe you this apology, I’m not sure if its more for you or for me but it was necessary. I’m not trying to bag you, I know you have a man but I do hope that we can be friends. But once again thanks for being such a good person to me, and I apologize for not returning the favor. So besides this message being three years too late, I hope to hear from you..feel free to hit me up on aim.. Scrambldvisions

And Congrats on graduating I was really proud of you…I know your teaching now but I hope you still try to become a magazine editor that’s a good look

Its to late for anything with her, she’s madly in love…but damn I know I’m gonna regret this for a long time smh

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Confused

Just a couple of things I am trying to understand…

1. Why take pictures of yourself in Lingerie post them on a dating site, and leave no other information if you get mad when a guy asssumes you just want sex?
2. Why call yourself something like “IWANTYOURCOCKINMYMOUTHNOW69″ if you dont want my cock in your mouth now…..
3. Do Women Really know what they want?
4. If every girl is one of a kind, how is any female original?

Make sure you check out condron.us

LL Cool J: Bitter Old Man

When two employees enter a job, neither one of them should have a mindset of complacency inside of their head. There should always be a hunger to climb that corporate ladder, because no matter what your status is, if you’re not the head man in charge, you can be kicked right off.

If second fiddle is ok with you, then at least understand you should always have some level of paranoia about your status. Understand that no matter what you have done for your company if the right person wants you gone you can leave. So with that thought in hand you should know everything you need to know to keep your situation at float. If you fail at that, don’t blame others for your failures. Its doesn’t take a genius to figure it out; it’s just a common sense thing.After years of faithful service to Def Jam records, LL Cool J seems to be fed up and ready to leave. When asked why, he cited the current Def Jam president (Jay-Z) as his main reason. Saying, “How am I gonna re-sign with competition, I’m not an idiot. I can’t depend on that man to promote my record while he’s somewhere writing rhymes. … I’m LL Cool J. I ain’t doing that, B.” Then just recently in the song “It’s a Queens Thing” he went on to throw some subliminals:

“I don’t slide like Usher, I don’t make no bands, I ain’t a frontin’ ass coward, I don’t rig Soundscan./ I wish Rick and Russell was back, I miss the old Def Jam. ‘Cause them new monkeys act like they don’t know who I am./ The promotion and marketing wasn’t worth a damn. /Now they on the balls again ‘cause 50’s my man? It’s a Queens’s thing, doofy; this is how we do…”.

After so many words being tossed in the Def Jam President’s direction from mister Todd Smith, its hard not to see that he may just be little bitter.

Lets think about it though, does he have a reason to be? LL’s first studio album came out in 1985, it is now the year 2007. Over those 22 years he has released 12 studio albums (including upcoming release Exit 13), won two Grammy awards, and has starred in several movies. Despite all of this success, LL has never introduced any artists, or even showed an interest in the industry outside of selling records. Like it or not this was one of the main reasons Jay-z was given the position of President and not him.

While one was taking his shirt off in countless videos and expanding towards an acting career, the other was building his empire, signing quality artists, and becoming a global icon. He has surpassed LL in almost every aspect of Hip-Hop. The nail in the coffin was him (Jay-z) being given the oh so glorified President position at Def Jam.

So now after his last album did less than stunning numbers, LL is angry all of a sudden and has a problem with Jay-Z? For a man of 39 years old who has been in the industry for over twenty years, and has such massive status why would you rely on another man to make your album sell?LL is right when he says he is one of the best to ever do it, and he is the reason Def Jam made it through those infant stages, but this is 2007 and what he did for Def Jam is nothing but a fond memory. Other than his album sales he has not really brought in much revenue for the label nor has he shown that he can build revenue from anything other than himself.

He’s Hip Hop’s very own Jose Canseco, as he has the ability to hit a home run (when it comes to record sales) but other than that he’s pretty useless and as the years go by every power hitters’ numbers will diminish. Knowing this, why would Def Jam put in an exuberant amount of money into his album, seeing that it was the most poorly received album from LL since “14 Shots To the Dome”. With a general album consensus rating as low as 2/5, does that sound like a home run hit to you?

What is LL really angry at? Is he mad that, in less time, President Carter has the position that LL was promised so many years ago? If so he has no stable ground to stand on. Promises are broken everyday, credentials influence those in power, and these days ones’ money making abilities are the only thing that guarantee results in this industry.

Should Jay Z have given his last album more attention, better promotion, and a “Kingdom Come-like” marketing plan? Probably, but if your going to get a Kingdom Come” marketing plan you have to pull in Kingdom Come” numbers, and the last time Mr. Todd smith went double platinum it was 1997. Combine that with declining rap sales, and the marketing plan used on his album made sense financially. Its been a little over a year and the album “Todd Smith” has only managed to go gold. Those numbers have nothing to do with a marketing plan, but they speak volumes about his popularity.

Yes LL is bitter, but honestly from the facts stated above he really has no right. He’s not a superstar in the Soundscan, he has never really seem to show the corporate skill, or desire to be an executive, and to be quite frank his last album sucked. He did more for hip hop than any one that I can think of, because in all honesty if he does not sign with Def Jam, Jay might have never comes into, half of the people who are here now might not be where they are.

He had an eleven year head start and still managed to fall behind. Don’t get mad now, its too late. He had his chance, but opportunity sped right past him, and from what it looks like, he probably just licked his lips and left it be.

Make sure you check out condron.us

More Random Stuff

Still feeling some kind of way about certain things, but currently kind of feeling better at the same time….didnt have much to write today, well at least at this moment so I figured I would post a vid and just say hi, lol… Maybe I’ll have something constructive up later today….Maybe….

oh and as always Make sure you check out condron.us

They Dont Have To Know…. Its not done but since you read my last little random thought slash Bitch fest, I owe it to you

Fast forward into time and we find a young Man, Broken to his core at the foot of his bed. The question plays quietly in the room like a whisper…. “How do you recover after you’ve been broken beyond your foundation, and then still shattered to more pieces. It was the sound of the phone that triggered the thought, which would lead him to the truth. Because through all of the troubles and all of the tribulations, he loved her, and nothing would stop him from getting through this rough patch with the only woman he ever loved. So with the idea that she was out with the girls, he went to go get a room at the nicest hotel he could find, so that the two of them could get away of everyone and everything, and rediscover the sanctuary that they once found in each others arms. Take a second to step away from this visual, and bounce a little into the past, just a splinter…. He’s in the Honeymoon suite a King Sized bed is covered in pink roses (her favorite) and in the background, Luther Vandross and Billie Holladay croon softly through the speakers, the scent that surrounds the room is the sweet aroma of her favorite Vanilla scented candles. The room is set up perfectly for them.

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Random thoughts

In the attempt to escape the way that we feel, we sometimes run right into it.

So instead of sprinting away from the thing that hurts us the most

We stand pat and watch as it tortures us with everything we never wanted to know

and even in that instant of pain, I still cant seem to take my eyes away

For a female to be able to have this control over me

I cant beleive I need to break free, But instead I stand straight as shoot right through.

so clearly these are my random thoughts, their clearly not that random because everyone who knows me knows exactly who and what I’m talking about. But for those of you who dont know me this is just another random thought through poetry. I really am frustrated so for no this is how I have to get it out… I’ll put some real content up tommorow, but right now this is just my mood…Real pissed and bothered by certain circumstances

Might As Well

Since I am currently in a very shitty mood, and pissed about this girl I guess I’ll just post some songs that will help me express my anger without expressing them outwardly.

This is a good song

This one because I feel like I keep making the same mistake with all of the women I pursure… SMFH

This is how she makes me feel right now

I do wish she would have liked me

Another Classic

you tell anybody I admitted having a broken heart, or anything close to it and I’ll kill you lol

 

and dont forget to show some love to condron.us

She Hates Me

I dont usually do this but today I’m definitely in the need to express some of my frustrations. I’ve liked this girl for a while now, probably since late February. She was busy with an Internship for most of the spring semester so the only way I could keep in contact with her was through sporattic text messages, which is totally fine, so she returns from her internship and I make my move.

I tell her how I feel and that I really want to get to know her better, with the hopes that well you know…. So she told me that I could give it a shot, but it was going to take hard work.

Since then I’ve tried to call her to hang out…No Bueno… I’ve texted her…and she would respond back once in a while. When I invited her to hang out….. I would get no response, but everytime I was ready to throw in the towel she seemed to give me a reason to hang tight and keep on fighting.

Then I run into her at an event a mutual friend was hosting, where I blatantly asked her if I was wasting my time, and she gives me nothing, never told me anything that would make me back down…..

But now all of a sudden I hear through a pretty reliable source, that she’s seeing some one else… I cant even Express how frustrated I am…. Its not even the fact that she’s not interested. I could have handled that, but why did she have to lead me on, and why couldnt she just been honest from the very begining.. So now I’m here feeling all Kinds of Pissed and wondering why I ever wasted my time…. Life truely does suck sometimes

Cant do shit but just listen to this song until I feel better.

Oh and be sure to check out other great blogs through condron.us 

Damn Nike

Now usually I dont create post that have nothing to do with some sort of short story or poem, but after watching this on Mreastons website, I had to post this up. Lebron James was totally and completely Owned in the newest Nike Commercial. Enjoy the comedy the way that I did.